My best friend’s name is Tori. We became best friends about two weeks ago while playing games at her house with a group of friends. The conversation went something like this:
Tori: I don’t have a best friend.
Me: Me neither. It’s sad.
Tori: We should be best friends, Ben!
Me: I can think of three good reasons why we shouldn’t be best friends.
Tori: Like what?
Me: Well, you’re 18, you’re dating someone, and you live far away. Any one of those reasons would be a deal breaker, and there are three of them.
Tori: Did you just reject my best friend request?
Me: … yes …
To placate Tori I told her that we could give it a one week trial. Instead of being Tori’s bff, I was her bffow (best friend for one week). The week went well so we decided we can be bfuslfcij (best friends until she leaves for college in January).
On Saturday some friends and I made gingerbread houses out of real gingerbread at Tori’s house. I’d never used real gingerbread before and it had been years and years since I’d even decorated a graham cracker house. We had loads and loads of candy options for decorating. I’m not very creative when it comes to decorating and I was a little overwhelmed by all the options. Tori, our hostess, does this every year and designed a very intricate house. I designed a peppermint path for my house which I thought was cool, but that Tori described as “cliché.” Not wanting to be cliché anymore I covered my roof in “terracotta tiles” and gave my house a nice “brick” façade. I think it turned out nicely although some of the other houses were much more spectacular than mine. It’s nice to have fun friends to do things with.
In January I will be without a best friend again. If you live in the Seattle area, have graduated from college, and are single, let me know and I'll let you fill out a best friend application. The application is quite simple, you just have to be willing to make me soup and keep me company when I get sick.
Tori's gingerbread house featured a murder scene on the front path.
That terracotta roof is probably the coolest thing I've seen this week. Not even kidding right now.
ReplyDeleteWow, what a great compliment from an awesome girl. Or should I say churrrl?
ReplyDeleteyou can tell Tori her gumdrop shrubbery is cliche.
ReplyDeleteBen! are you going to the skating thing tomorrow? Also, I hear you were in the temple the other day when my ward was there! How crazy is that.
ReplyDeleteFirst of all, thank you for making me laugh out loud in the middle of a dreary work day.
ReplyDeleteSecondly, I think one of your stipulations should be negotiable: location. It's totally fine to have a best friend that lives in... say... Utah. I meet all your other requirements. That should count for something. (Plus I don't have a best friend either).
Ben, almost all of the comments on any given blog post of yours are from girls. Maybe you should have a girlfriend application, I bet you'd get lots of hits.
ReplyDeleteLine up behind me, ladies!
You are definitely one hysterical guy. I have to say, that Allison makes the most sense. You should have a girlfriend application. Sad to say, I'm also out of the running since I'm no longer single. Does that mean I'll never have to feed you again? :) Then again, it's been a few years since I have fed you and Lindsay and I are not living close together so there is a lot less food being produced by both of us.
ReplyDeleteI guess that means we've been un-friended since I don't meet all of the qualifications. Hope your search for a bff/girlfriend is successful.
I think you have a good list of requirements for a best friend. I know after I was on a search for a new best friend, I found my spouse...so Good luck!
ReplyDeleteMaybe I'll move to Seattle...
ReplyDeleteWord verification of the day: waggeret.
I just know you love knowing those things.